Last Day of 2011

These last few days of 2011 have been so busy that I haven't had the chance to blog about Christmas, but I am not complaining because nothing beats being the company of great and amazing people!!

• December 17-Pajama Party with a group of my best friends
• December 22-Christmas Party Reunion with friends I've made from the Alaka'i Malama Academy
• December 23-Christmas Lunch Date with my best friends Chris, Ian, PJ, Abe, and Melenj
• December 23-Ma'ohi Nui Christmas Party with my hula sisters and brothers
• December 24-Christmas Eve spent openning presents with the Burgess' then Midnight Mass with MY family, Abi, and Hallie
• December 25-Christmas Day spent with both sides again.
• December 26-Registered at Babies 'r' Us
• December 28-Surprise Birthday Dinner for Sharon Sonson
• December 30-Birthday Dinner for Shayna Muhammad

So many great events leading up to 2012.  I spent today, cleaning and helping my mom and aunties prepare a feast for the New Year!  I know I have had a negative attitude about them prior to this blog, but on Christmas Day, I asked my Jesus if it was too late to change my Grinchy-attitude and if I could still ask for his forgiveness.  Since then I have been more loving and happy towards them and try to carry on with helping my mom!!  We did a lot of cleaning and preparing today... now, I must get ready to go to a bbq with my baby's daddy and his family :D

Cookie also has a new bed, which is under the soft blanky, courtesy of my loving sister, Tine :0)

She looooves it soooo much!!! Thanks Tine!!

Have a safe celebration everyone!! More pictures to come :)

19 Days Left in 2011

    With the year nearing its end, there are still a couple of things I wanted to do to make this year complete.  Every year I'm always good and punctual with gathering a lot of my "pre-loved" belongings and donating them to my local Goodwill bin and writing out donations to the St. Jude Foundation and Children's AIDs foundation, but this year I've slacked :( I know that I've given a lot of clothes and money to my family that has moved to Hawaii earlier this year... and along with their Christmas presents, I think I've given them more than enough!!  They are not the only people in need.

    Christmas cards :0)  I love receiving Christmas cards, especially when I get so see my friend's Holiday photos.  I thought of sending some out this year as well in hopes that it'll reach my recipients in a timely fashion.  It seemed like a great idea to me at first, but then I really thought about it... my baby's daddy and I aren't married so to me it seems silly to say, "Merry Christmas!  Love, Jax and Junior and fetus" versus, "Merry Christmas!  Love, The [Franklins]"  We're not really a family-unit yet so I'll hold off until next year :0)

    ****Okay, sorry this has nothing to do with the last 19 days of 2011, but I need to vent, like right now!  So my mom had asked me to prepare lunch for her patients.  Previously when I was working full time, my dad would help her w/ caring for them and just recently my mom's sisters would also help since they just moved here and couldn't find jobs that they liked.  But today, my dad is still in Guam and it's one of those days where her sisters left the house, probably gallivanting and spending the money my mom gives them.  My dad and I are my mom's primary substitute care-givers so we KNOW how to do these things and we don't get paid to help her.  Anyways, I had something baking in the oven for the patients and moments later my mom's sisters arrive back at the house.  I specifically told them that I was already preparing their meals and I would monitor their food and I would remove it from the oven WHEN IT WAS READY!  So I left for a while to continue w/ my blog and with all that being instructed my stupid Aunty removes what I had baking minutes prior to it being done and the both of them were constantly asking, "Is it cooked? Is it cooked?" ...This is me in my head knowing that the meat is un-fucking-cooked [OH MY FAHHHKING GOODNESS!!!  ARE YOU FRIKKEN KIDDING ME?!?!?  Did you not hear what I had told you... that I would remove it from the oven WHEN IT WAS READY!]  I ovbiously cannot stand them and I know the only reason why they are SOOOOO willing to help is because my mom pays them to help because after a couple of months not finding a job they decided to settle with not working.  They're too fucking lazy to go out and look for real jobs like the rest of us Americans have to do.  Gunfunnit it took me fucking 8 months to find the job I wanted and this was AFTER COLLEGE... with a degree!  I don't want my mom to have to keep working just to continue to give them an income... these fuckers have to learn on their own!!!!!!  Yes, I know I'm not working now, but I intend to when baby is here and I have some monies saved up.  I'm so maaaaaad at them!!!! UGGGHHH!!!!****

    Okay so back to my blog... So, my dad has been gone since October and the job was only supposed to be for 3 weeks, meaning he was supposed to be back before, if not by November 12, 2011, my birthday :0( as of today, December 12, 2011.  He is not back yet.  Delay after delay after delay!!!  I am upset with his job!!  He has already missed Halloween, my birthday, my mom's birthday, Thanksgiving weekend, and at this rate, most likely Christmas too :0(  I just hope that he returns home in the next 19 days that are left in this year.

    Usually during this time, I like to gather up ideas for resolutions for the upcoming year.  Working out or staying fit is usually somewhere on that list, but this year I feel it is especially crucial since I'm gaining weight with child.  I was going through some of my old files and found some old photos.  And although I don't have a clear set of New Year's Resolutions for 2012, I can use the photos that I found as motivation for whatever I resolute to do hehe!!

    Wish me luck ;0)  Have a blessed "19 days everyone!"  Now, I'm off to gather some things to donate!  Love you all!!

Last Christmas

It's almost hard to believe that this year is coming to an end!  Last Christmas doesn't seem so long ago.  I spent the Holidays practicing day in and day out for our Tahitian group's Christmas Production over at the Aloha Tower.  Who knew that, that was to be the last Christmas I'd spend being myself--meaning the pre-pregnant me hehe!  And although the year seemed to have gone by so quickly, my pregnancy just seems to draaaag day by day :0(  I seriously can't wait for baby to come so I can hold my precious angel in my arms instead of in my womb.

Along this journey I was able to take some maternity pictures.  In the beginning when I had arrived home from our Japan dance tour I already knew in my head that if I decided to take any pictures with child, I didn't want to do the typical beach photos that a lot of expecting mothers take only because these days, the beaches are crowded w/ photo shoots!  I remember our family did a shoot during the New Year and our photographer said she would "photoshop people out of the scenery." I didn't want something "made or photoshoped."  I wanted something simple, natural, and wow!  Here are just a few of the photos that were taken by my awesome friend, Ian Susa.  All I can say is that it pays to do your homework and that I have the greatest friends ever!!

The holidays always gets me in a cheerful mood!  I love when my mom and I get together to "Deck the Halls" We bought our Christmas tree and I got to decorate it this year... no it's no Rockefeller Center tree, in fact it's quite small and meek :0)

I also wanted to display some of the cool gifts that I got.  [Ever since I was little I didn't have the patience to wait for Christmas to open gifts.  I'd always creep under the tree and tear little holes in the wrapping paper just to get a little sneak hehe!]

My boyfriend got me and ipad!!!!!  Okay so some of the things I did gift myself lol, but doesn't mean that I ONLY shop for myself... no, no, NOOO, not at all!

Aside from the gifts that I've bought for family and friends, I am still helping my mom financially to help HER FAMILY make a living.  Some days I don't mind, but other days I think about how soon I will have a family of my own and I can't be always throwing my money here and there to help them!!  And it hurts me a lot and I get so emotional because the kids don't appreciate the sacrifices that I've had to make.  I had to give up my room for them, our pets suffer having to live outside because of them, I've given clothes to them, bought groceries for them, give my mom money for their rent and other things.  No, these kids don't know that a portion of the money comes from me.  They don't know how to take care of MY family's home.  They don't know who pays the electricity bills and cleans up the kitchen and bathroom after them.  They don't know how much it hurts me to be in this situation and I sometimes feel that my mom even forgets.

Today is one of my cousin's birthday.  My mom wants to throw a pizza party and asks me for money to pay for it.  I overheard one of my aunts asking how much it would cost and my mom said, "No, it's okay!  I got it!"  Oh **crinkled forhead** well doesn't she mean that I (her daughter) GOT IT!  Then, of course the kids will eat all the food and leave nothing for me... as usual!  I think they just assume I'm invisible and I'm not hungry :0(  I've been feeling this way for a very long time and I'm constantly battling my thoughts to just be nice because my mom tells me constantly to not scold them, but it's so hard!!  How could I not scold them?!  On top of everything I've previously mentioned my cousins even dared to look at porn on my computer--which was in my room--without my consent!!!

If there's really anything I would want for Christmas... it would be to have peace in this home once again and for my parents to get a break from her relatives taking everything from them :0(  Hopefully this will be the last Christmas that I will spend having to feel this way :0(

UPDATE: The kids ate all the cheetos :'( but it's okay because I always start to feel bad because of the happy smiles on all of their faces.  Here's the second round of gifts for my family that is not overseas.  The santa sacks are for the kids filled with candy goodies and some money... key word is some money because hello?!  Aunteh not rich! HAHAHAHAHA!

H A P P Y . H O L I D A Y S . E V E R Y O N E !!!